HOW THE NICE GIRLS CLUB GOT STARTED

Jules Russell and Lisa Saunders heading through the Mystic Drawbridge,  Mystic, Connecticut.  

(Photograph by Jim Saunders) 

by Lisa Saunders

When my husband, Jim, and I relocated from New York to the maritime village of Mystic, Connecticut, in 2010, we landed into a nest of exciting seafarers to meet. But when these folks learned I was a landlubber, I found it hard to break into their culture. 

Even strangers thought I had problems. Shortly after stepping out of our new home for my first stroll through the historic seacoast community, a woman pulled over in her van and yelled, "Excuse me." Assuming she was a tourist wanting directions to Mystic Pizza or some other attraction, I wasn't prepared for what she really wanted to know: "Do you realize the back of your skirt is tucked into your underwear?" 

One day, I met another new girl in town, Cindy Modzelewski. She invited me to a club she had joined recently. We saw very quickly, however, that I didn't quite fit there either. When one of the other members said something unflattering to me in front of the others, Cindy felt so badly, she cried in her car with me after the meeting. She said, “I’m so sorry, I never would have invited you if I’d known that would happen.”

I wasn’t that upset, but I made a decision: from then on, I would only socialize with women who believed the best about a stranger or an acquaintance--who could find ways to celebrate what’s good in another.

Touched by Cindy’s sympathy for me, I said, “Cindy, why don’t we just start our own club, one we can call the Nice Girls Club. The only thing you have to do to get in is be nice! There will be no dues and nothing you have to ‘do’ as a member, except to stay nice to one another!” And that is how we started.

From then on, whenever Cindy and I met a woman we thought was nice, we would ask her to join our Nice Girls Club. My life in Mystic began to take off. As an independent writer, I couldn’t wait to join another founding member, Jules, on the epic sea voyage she invited me on. I had met her at the famous Mystic drawbridge seen the movie, “Mystic Pizza,” starring Julia Roberts.

While preparing for this voyage to help Jules and her Nice Guy bring their boat from the Chesapeake Bay to Mystic in the winter of 2012, I imagined myself persevering against all odds to become the last to succumb to scurvy should we be cast adrift at sea. I would finally join the ranks of Mystic seafarers!

Sadly, however, I abandoned ship on my new friends when we docked in Delaware. I thought I would have to hang my head in Mystic for the rest of my life. But Jules was, just as I had thought, a very nice girl! She forgave me and we moved forward to have more adventures—seagoing and otherwise. Our story is told in my book, Mystic Seafarer's Trail, where you will meet several more Nice Girls.

Do you wish you could join a Nice Girls Club, a club with its only goal is to have fun? Do you want to meet up with friends for potlucks, walks, movies, coffees or Happy Hours? All you need is one nice friend to start a Nice Girls Club. We started the Mystic Nice Girls Club in 2010 and are still going strong. To be a Nice Girl, you must vow to refrain from saying anything unkind to or about another in the group. It's that simple! To make that rule easier to follow, we don't discuss politics or other issues that might divide us. Our goal is to believe the best about each other so friendships can form, deepen, and be maintained. We are all bound by the one thing we have in common--the need for positive female companionship and support.  

The core event for our Nice Girls Club is our monthly potluck where we relax with each other over our favorite recipes or store-bought foods and drinks. For those who don’t like to host a potluck, we ask they organize us to meet at an inexpensive restaurant where we can all pay on separate checks.

This blog (and soon book) shares what has worked to keep our Club going, challenges we try to overcome, and introduces you to some of our members. We will tell you about our Nice Girl Club thoughts or experiences and our favorite potluck recipes. For those of us too busy or uninterested in cooking, we will discuss our store-bought dishes that continue to be a hit!

I chose the image of three cartoon women you see on the blog because I thought it was a fun portrayal of who we are as a group—women who vow to see, say or hear nothing unkind about each other. Instead, we forebear with and even celebrate some of each other’s quirks.

Now go meet some of the other Nice Girls!

Lisa Saunders

Mystic, Connecticut

October 27, 2018